original grace

Once again, I find myself overwhelmed on my birthday. I can't believe that God wanted me. There is no other explanation for my birth. He wanted me. He knew me before anyone else knew me. The Bible says that He knit me together. Since then, He has never forgotten me. He has provided. He has sustained. He has abundantly given me more than I need. He has allowed me to experience pain in order that I might know His love. He has been my best friend and He has never let me go no matter how many times I try to run away. He has accepted me even though I have doubted.

Most of all, I can't believe He wanted me before I was born, knowing I would rebel against Him. He knew all of me, even the ugliest places of my heart, and He wanted me anyways. And He calls me beautiful anyways! What crazy love?

His original grace preceded my original sin. And on top of that, He knowingly chose to experience death so that I would never have to face it myself. I can't believe He wanted me here. Much less can I believe that He wanted me to live and never die. How am I to ever repay Him?

"Upon you I have leaned from before my birth; you are he who took me from my mother's womb. My praise is continually of you." -Psalm 71:6